stories

now that my job isn't crippling me with pain and fatigue, i'll try to write more of The Generic Adventure.

Goe, stretching.

myspace

was told by a relative to get a myspace account. told them i'd think about it. i did think about it, and i'm going to pass. they said that they have one and i've been trying to find it with google, to no avail as of yet.

update: was sent a link by his wife.

Goe, will keep trying.

conversation at work

crazy guy: "it says scantron, i thought it said scat tron."
me: "scat is never wrong."
crazy guy: "that's right."

Goe, gonna go help kitties in the morning.

overheard

i overheard someone today telling someone else that jesus was crucified by the romans because he had walked on water. lesson here: if you're going to try telling bible stories, read the bible first!

Goe, nothing follows.

alkeehol

i've been invited to go out drinking after work with some of my coworkers three times now, tonight being the first time i had any cash with me and accepted. having trouble typing even though i only had half a bottle of something called "black butte porter", a horrible drink i wouldn't recommend to anyone. tasted like rotten fruit with a strong aftertaste of bitter apples. i didn't try anything else, but my manager was drinking guiness, one batshit insane guy was drinking the porter stuff (the reason i decided to try it), and two people were drinking something else. i didn't have more because i didn't want to get so drunk i couldn't get myself home, or start vomiting or anything. i don't think i'm drunk, but i know my coordination is a bit off (still typing 75wpm or faster though). one weird side effect is that my mind seems to be clearer now than it normally is, but was like that before we even got to the bar. the crazy guy and myself got rides to the bar from a hispanic guy we work with (the crazy guy carpools with him) and crazy guy kept giving him directions in sort of a mock-spanish that the driver had trouble understanding, and the crazy guy didn't even know where the place was. drove past it three times.

trying to be responsible, i left at 11:30ish, made my way home (there now), to find out (cellphones not allowed where i work), that i have a second interview at a place i interviewed at last week. they want to schedule a time this weekend, but i've got a family reunion tomorrow, and i don't know if they'll be open to sunday or not. may have to stop by on the way to the reunion. lower pay but more hours and less backbreaking work.

Goe, at least makes his money honestly.

Bus stop

So I'm waiting at a bus stop with a bunch of other people, and a bus pulls up. one person gets on the bus, the second person in line stands at the door asking the bus driver questions, not getting on, not letting others get on. that bus was running late, so the next bus (frequent service line) pulls up behind it. the crowd blocked my path to the second bus, and it was gone before the person asking the first bus driver questions made up their mind about whether or not to take that bus. everyone else there just stood around, oblivious to the second bus which, due to the indecisiveness of the second boarder, wound up in front of the first bus. is being aware of what's going on around you really that difficult that a bus is hard to spot?

Goe, cause they're not smaller than a breadbasket.

Space Age

a upi headline, repeated on drudge

NASA to use Space Age 'droid' satellites

Wouldn't any artificial satellite be "space age"?

Goe, needs a disco nap.

Bank of America

Bank of America, it turns out, doesn't honor checks written on their accounts unless you have an account with them also. told me to go to a check-cashing store instead.

Goe, grrrrr.

writing

had a dream last night in which i started writing a whole new long story. need to finish up the ones i've already started though.

Goe, maybe will write more soon.

weird bird

a few weeks ago, i was walking down the street and there was a crow on a power line sort of overhead. since lots of birds like to sit on power lines, it wasn't that weird. it got weird when the bird started following me and cawing, almost overhead, for half a block. at least it didn't hit me with anything.

Goe, tired.

storyblogging

there's another one up over there.

Goe, pointing the way.

Vegetable Oil

So I wasn't paying attention and bought some tuna fish in vegetable oil. It tastes funny and probably is unhealthy compared to the tuna in water that I normally get. It's like some sinister tuna company plot. Evil bastards!

Goe, raging against tunaco.

Lawyers

I know lawyers are evil and all, but I want a second opinion on this.

Q. What are the basic requirements for rest breaks under Oregon law?
A. Employers must provide workers with a paid, uninterrupted 10-minute rest break for every four-hour segment or major portion thereof in the work period. OAR 839-020-0050(1)(b). The rest break should be given in the middle of each segment, whenever possible.

- here

would working 20 minutes, taking a ten minute break, then working four and a half hours be discouraged or illegal?

Q. What does "major portion" of four hours mean?
A. The "major portion" of four hours means any segment greater than two hours. Whenever a segment exceeds two hours, the employer must provide a rest break for that segment.

this would imply it was illegal, but i'm thinking that it may be legal depending on how one decides to break out the five hours into a four hour period and the lesser part of a four hour period.

Goe, will probably mail in a complain this weekend unless he hears otherwise.

business idiocy.

i posted once, a while ago and i don't have the inclination to dig it up for a link, about a company who encouraged money-saving ideas by rewarding employees who suggested them. the company bought the reward (a case of soda in most cases) at the company headquarters and shipped it overnight to the person being rewarded, even if they were on the other side of the country. that company threatened to fire anyone who pointed out that overnighting something that could be bought locally was a waste of money. today, i found out that a major financial institution (hence someplace that really should know better) buys paper in bulk at one location and ships it to all their branch offices, instead of sending an assistant manager down to officemax or officedepot to pick up some more. good news: i can barely feel any pain in my arms. bad news: it's because i feel almost nothing but the pains in my feet and back.

Goe, tired.

job security

got a job that isn't likely to leave me anytime soon like some have in the past. it's the closest thing locally to working in a coal mine that i know of (part-time and low paying to boot), but it's a regular paycheck, and regular paychecks are nice. had another interview this morning that went along the lines of 'we don't care if you can outwork every employee we have, you're a loser so go away!'... so since it turns out that i don't really need my brain for anything, i've been thinking of taking up a new vice, alcohol (never touched the stuff previously) being a frontrunner concept. Pesky brain cells! Take that!

Goe, using Rachmeg's link to plan his revenge on you all!

Chapter Seven

It would have been normal for them to reach Ambush Pass in the mid-afternoon, but they weren't making very good time. The dust and noise of the other traffic on the road, sparse as it was, kept them moving somewhat slower than any of them would have liked. Snarky seemed out of place on a horse, and spent a large part of the morning walking rather than ride on what was clearly a very fine mount. The Goon brothers, both better teamsters than swordsmen, kept the wagon moving as smoothly as the roadway permitted. Twice, Selfless raised his head up to check on their progress, scowling at Snarky before sinking back down into the baggage.
They stopped near mid-day to rest and water the horses near a small stand of trees near an equally small village. None of the farmers, merchants, or travellers they had seen in the morning had paid them any heed, and the villagers they saw were likewise disinterested. The village was located where it was because it was about four hours from the city, making it's small pub a convenient resting stop for those going on a long journey, as well as a convenient place for farmers to sell their crops and livestock to merchants out on day trips from the city. Larger towns, usually walled and with their own ruling noblemen, lay another four hours out on each of the roads excepting the one Snarky was taking the party down. The road before them was deemed so perilous that few dared to traverse it, leaving the town of Abandoned to overgrowth and disrepair.
Adolescent, raised in a very similar village, kept gawking at the few peasants he could see, and had to be prodded into tending his own horse by Idiot. Having grown up tending farm animals, Adolescent still took a few moments to discern the canvas feed bag from the canvas water bag. This put him in a more caring position than Snarky in terms of their horses. Snarky didn't even seem to be aware that his horse needed water. He just tied the reins to the back of the wagon and walked to the trees. As he began gathering wood, Stupid and Idiot moved his horse up with their master's and the wagon team.
Selfless sat up in the wagon, watching Snarky gather wood. He barely acknowledged Amiable or Dandy when they climbed up and sat next to him. Amiable dug into one of the bags and brought out some bread and cheese that he shared with the others. Noreach grabbed a few large pieces and went o share them with Adolescent, Idiot, and Stupid, who were discussing the merits of various horse breeds.
“You don't suppose that Snarky fellow is going to cook his lunch, do you?” asked Fop, who would obviously preferred a cooked lunch to the bread he was chewing.
“I was told by Assistant Advisor that Snarky Anachronism was well-traveled and brilliant man unaccustomed to our ways. He seems, though, to have a very slow wit.” answered Selfless. He paused a moment before turning abruptly to Amiable, “Did I miss anything this morning?”
“Nothing.”
“There were a lot of filthy peasants like the ones we dealt with last time,” volunteered Dandy, “a few messengers galloping past.”
“Toward the city or the pass?” asked Selfless.
“The city,” said Amiable, “You missed nothing important., but if I may ask the Lord Fop, what was your last excursion?”
“Oh, someone kidnapped the crown prince. We found him in the headquarters of a supposed bandit king named Scruffy Vagabond. Vagabond made the foolish claim that the prince had kidnapped himself. The prince is safe thanks to the actions of myself and Sacrifice, and Vagabond is in the prison, where his sort belongs, no offense.”
“None taken.”
Selfless spoke slowly and with greater elocution than he normally did, the while staring at Snarky who had finished his gathering and was approaching the wagon with an armful of wood, “The Advisors, both of them, for they know me well and give me some of their confidence, believe Vagabond and not the prince. They favor seeing his brother on the throne.”
“Oh, dear,” muttered Dandy under his breath. “Come now,” he said with a raised voice, “What did you bring this wood for?”
“Firewood for the barren plain, to keep the dark beasts away.”
“Good thinking, that.” said Amiable with a grin.
“We can get wood anywhere,” said Selfless, harshly.
“Yes, but this is Kindling Grove. It's the best wood to get a fire started,” replied Snarky, somewhat taken aback by Selfless' harshness.
“I fail to see the point of carrying wood with us, just as I fail to see the ponit in taking a road full of bandits just to save a few days, but the Assistants' saw fit to leave you in charge.” Selfless then climbed down from the wagon and readied his own horse.
Fop hesitated before blurting out, “Actually, as the only noble, I'm in charge here.”
“He's already foraged the wood, it'll save us time later,” offered Amiable, smiling and shrugging.
Dandy beamed at him, “Good point, that,” before turning back to Snarky. “Put it in the wagon for later.”
Snarky did as he was told, and a few minutes later the group was moving again, going further up into the hills.

Goe, sorry it's taking so long.

Volcano Lancing

You may think it's not important. You may think you live many miles from anything even looking like a volcano. Geology says you're wrong. They're coming to get you!

Goe, not so worried about the jacobin squirrels.

stories

you can storyblog!

Goe, needs to get more written.

A Person charged in any State with Treason, Felony, or other Crime, who shall flee from Justice, and be found in another State, shall on demand of the executive Authority of the State from which he fled, be delivered up, to be removed to the State having Jurisdiction of the Crime.

excerpt of Article 4, section 2, U.S. Constitution

Yesterday evening, someone who frequently wants to argue about nothing claimed that the above 'flee' means that if a person is involuntarily removed from a state, that state couldn't extradite them back until Earl Stanley Gardner told some friends of his and had the extradition laws of california changed to permit it.

UGH!

Goe, oh yeah...

meh

typing it in, found major contradictions that i need to fix :(

Goe, blah.

writing

one more chapter of the generic adventure up tonight, probably another before the week's over.

Goe, doesn't know if anyone's been reading it.

SciFi Channel Movies

Important Rules for any movie made for showing on Sci-Fi Network.

1. There must be a conspiracy, either corporate or governmental, which intereferes with the heroes saving the world.

2. The two main heroes can't get along at the start, but must grudgingly accept working together.

3. Any plan devised by experts allied with the heros to save the world will have a fatal flaw, (usually not a big enough explosion) that will require the sacrifice of said expert or minor hero. The flaw will be revealed not before 30 minutes before the end of the film. - Moonwhisper

4. At least one of the heroes must have pre-existing knowledge of the conspiracy.

5. Among the heroes, at least one man must claim at least one woman isn't up to the job of saving the world.

6. Any available experts will have unparalleled knowledge and skills in a tremendous number of different, nominally unrelated fields.

7. If the heroes say a nuclear explosion is the only way to save the world, it is but the military will be reluctant. If they oppose nuclear weapons as unnecessary, the military will want to use one anyway.

8. Any indigenous superstitions will turn out to be correct.

9. The conspiracy will want to kill the heroes after the world is saved, if the shown conspirators live that long.

10. At least one scientific expert will have been outcast for their claims. The things they claim will be used by the heroes to save the world.

11. If the press attacks a character as being evil, it'll be one of the good guys.

Goe, only came up with 10, will add more or any from comments to the list later.

Rumsfeld is still an idiot.

I'm very much in favor of securing our borders, winning the current war,
and having a kick-ass military, which is why I still think Rumsfeld is
still an idiot. One of the motives for the pentagon's 'transformation'
is to reduce the ratio of tail to teeth so that more of our soldiers are
in combat roles instead of support roles. This leaves us with the
question that if reducing the tail is so beneficial, why are we using href="http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,198097,00.html">soldiers to be
the tail for non-military agencies. The real reason is that the
tail is needed and can't be done away with no matter what href="http://www.indepundit.com/">some people think. It can
probably be shrunk a bit, there is always some waste, but not enough to
drastically alter the structure of our military. The ratio remains
about the same in 'transformation', but the tooth part is shrunk as
well, and as soldiers are removed from the tail, they're replaced by
civilian's on the pentagon's payroll. The real savings doesn't come
from shrinking the tail, it comes from shrinking the teeth, something
done with trickery to make the teeth seem to grow instead.

Goe, against it.

Rose Festival Schmosefestival

There be a new story festival!

Goe, not really a pirate.

EU spyplanes

"robot spyplanes to guard Europe's borders"

From what, exactly?

Fleets of unmanned "drone" aircraft fitted with powerful cameras are to be used to patrol Europe's borders in a dramatic move to combat people-smuggling, illegal immigration and terrorism.

The people-smuggling, illegal immigration, and terrorism of which they knowingly let active participants enter and exit freely. If it's policy to let them all in anyways, on the pretense of refuge or diversity, what is the point of buying robot spyplanes to watch people come if you already know they're coming and don't care?

Goe, confused by the wishy-washy.